Does He Love Me?
One Teen's Question
Dear Dr. Gilda,
I am 14 years old
an I need to know if I am in love. I think I am, but I need reassurance.
Okay, this is the story. I met this guy, Jimmy. He liked me and
I like him. He asked me out and I said yes. We went out for about
a month. Then he didn't call me and I didn't call him. One night,
out of the blue, he called and we talked. Neither of us had quit
liking each other. He met my dad and mom and they both liked him.
I think I love Jimmy but I don't know for sure. When he talked to
my mom, he told her he thought he was in love with me. Only about
a week ago, he had said he didn't want a relationship. But then
he got into a fight over me. What do you think I should do?
One Confused Girl
Dear One Confused Girl,
You are a very smart
girl. You went out with Jimmy for a month, and then when he didn't
call you, you didn't call him. As I say in "Teen Talk with Dr. Gilda,"
a lot of girls make the mistake of trying to force romance by calling
a guy after they haven't heard from him. By doing that, they push
the guy further away. But you did a very smart thing. Teen guys
are not as emotionally mature as girls. They need time to figure
out what they're really feeling. By not calling him, you gave him
that time. Now, although he didn't think he wanted a relationship,
guess what?? He thinks he's in love--and he even got into a fight
with someone to prove it! (PS: However nice he seems, you never
want to be involved with a hot head, so thoroughly check out that
part of his personality.)
nothing at all that you must do at this time. Just continue being
your usual independent self. Obviously, when he wants to find you,
he knows how to do that. And when you give a guy enough rope, he
often tangles himself up--in love!
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