What takes only an hour to apply, and more than a year to remove? A tattoo. When I first saw Angelina Jolie's tattoo of Billy Bob's name on her arm, knowing the shelf life of most Hollywood hookups, I wondered what she would do when their romance soured. Even if she only got angry at the guy, how would she regroup while his name forever spooked her? After their breakup, she actually had to suffer through laser blasting to banish it, and she admits now how agonizing that process was.

After an angry public divorce, Tom Arnold had Roseanne Barr's face removed from his chest. Barr removed a tattoo on her buttock that read, "Property of Tom Arnold."

Pamela Anderson tattooed Tommy Lee's name on her ring finger in lieu of a marriage band. At the time, that probably seemed like a cool idea. But when their love disintegrated, she didn't laser it off; she CUT it off! If Melanie Griffith ever opted to become that drastic with that giant heart of Antonio's name embedded on her upper arm, she’d undoubtedly need hospitalization!

But let’s not judge this glamour trend. Well-known people in all walks of life sport tattoos. The Wall Street Journal conceded that body art, as it’s called, has gained acceptance even in once-staid office settings. The Alliance of Professional Tattooists said that one in every 10 Americans have tattoos, up from one in every hundred three decades ago. We know that Dennis Rodman and Tommy Lee are veritable advertisements for the practice. Monaco's Princess Stephanie displays a bracelet tattoo on her wrist and one on her ankle. And plenty of fancy ladies permanently tattoo eyeliner, lip liner, and eyebrows to avoid the hassles of daily makeup.

While tattooing seems to be part of our culture, it dates back centuries. In 1300 B.C., Egyptian mummies displayed blue tattoo marks. And recently, a photograph of an "iceman" wearing a tattoo was discovered buried in a glacier in the Italian Alps 5,300 years ago. In 1769, Captain James Cook wrote about the Tahitian practice of "tatau," which his sailors received from the Polynesian natives and subsequently carried into their English ports. Wearers claim their insignias demonstrate the control they have over their lives. But Rodman and Lee don chains of bondage that seem more to be declarations of subservience than the independence they would like to boast.

In 1998, the Air Force forbid tattoos from covering more than a quarter of an exposed body part. In one of their clinics in San Antonio, many people who elected to rid their tattoos admitted that the name they displayed was no longer someone special in their life. Having the wrong name on your body can be troublesome. Just ask Portia de Rossi, ex-girlfriend of Francesca Gregorini, who needed to quickly remove the “F.G.” insignia from her ring finger as soon as she re-grouped with Ellen DeGeneres. Or Paris Hilton, who had her ex, Nick Carter’s name, indelibly engraved on her butt. Or, Johnny Depp, who had "Winona Forever" tattooed on his arm during his 3-year relationship and subsequent engagement to Winona Ryder. After they parted, he had the "na" of the artwork removed, and it read, "Wino Forever." Drew Barrymore, Halle Berry, and Alyssa Milano also declared their love for their flavor-of-the-moment in permanent ink—and needed to make some subsequent adjustments.

One of my talk show appearances involved a woman who had her ex's name adorning her ankle. Her new boyfriend demanded that she get it removed, but she couldn't afford the process. Contrary to popular belief, one stop to the doctor's office won't do the trick. It takes an average of--can you believe?--25 visits, depending on the size and the colors of the decoration. And the time between appointments is 6 to 8 weeks, so it can take longer than a year to visibly cast off a lover. During the talk show, the new boyfriend ranted that as long as his woman sported her ex's name, he would not sleep with her. They wanted me to sort it out, but I'm a Relationship Expert, not a tattoo remover.

Removal takes only 10 seconds per visit. Some people elect dermabrasion, which involves sanding the skin with a rotary abrasive instrument, causing it to peel. Sometimes the process leaves scars, and some people have bad reactions. Moreover, red ink may turn black from the laser, which especially affects those with lip liner. Occasionally, little spots remain, requiring skin to be cut out. For larger tattoos, a skin graft from another body part may be necessary. For the squeamish, these methods draw blood. In addition, they can be expensive. A dermatologist in New York charges $500 to $750 a session to remove a tattoo, depending on its size. He admits, "They're a lot easier to get than to remove.” He adds that sometimes people are left with some residual hypopigmentation, skin that is lighter in the area where the tattoo once resided, and sometimes the outline of the former tattoo is still visible.

With all it takes to remove a tattoo of your former lover's name, people who sport one may be more inclined to stay together. But if you are considering a tattoo as a means of love insurance, now that you know the skinny, you might want to reconsider!